Insomnia in fibromyalgia - shutting off the mind

I've had this problem for years and years.  Insomnia and being unable to shut off my mind.  I can't attribute it exclusively to fibromyalgia, as my insomnia has been decades-long, and in my particular case it hasn't got much to do with my fibro.  It's just a coincidence that insomnia and/or sleep disorders are also part of fibro.  Sort of a chicken and egg thing -- I don't know which came first.  Perhaps the insomnia and sleep disorder caused the fibro.  Who the hell knows?  And at this point, after all these years, does it matter?  I deal.

I don't think "bad thoughts" in the night, such as they talk about on mental health quizzes.  In other words, it's not "I suck, I am so bad, I am so ugly, I am so fat, I want to die".  In fact, I have a superiority complex, so for me, the bad thoughts about myself is a non-issue, because there are none.  It's everybody else I have a problem with!  I am "The Great I Am" in the middle of the night.  I will solve everyone's problems, including yours, and the entire world's.  Watch out world.  My thoughts border on mania.  Or maybe it's not bordering on at all.  I suppose it is mania.

My To-Do list invades my middle-of-the-night, especially if I'm hormonal, and I can't stop thinking about how I am going to solve all of my problems, workplace issues, and then.... WORLD PEACE.

I do manage to fall asleep around dawn, and then, when I get up to start the day, I'm so exhausted, I can't even think about solving any problem other than feeding the family and going to work.  Ugh.

I honestly thought it was just me.  That I was alone in this curse (and the other curse of remembering everything, everything, everything -- but that's another topic altogether).  But then I saw this funny cartoon on a fibromyalgia page on social media; and all the followers' comments that went with it; and I thought wow, it isn't just me.  Nice to know I'm not so alone.

Cartoon/photo courtesy of FibroMusic's Facebook page.


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